Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Is It My Fault?

Is it my fault?
That you do not listen
That you make the wrong choices
Is that my fault?
That you sought to kill me
Or you ask the wrong questions
Is it really my fault?

Is it my fault?
That you would rather do nothing
That you prefer an illusion
Is that my fault?
That you think you know me better than I do
That you cling to stale interpretations of wisdom
Is it really my fault?

It is my fault?
That you celebrate my birthday from a previous lifetime
On the day someone else was was born
Is that my fault?
That you give each other presents
And often forget me on this holiday
Is it really my fault?

Is it my fault?
That you keep repeating the same lie
Because it made some sense, some time ago
Is that my fault?
That you are better at doubting than believing
Proficient at making excuses
Is it really my fault?

Is it my fault?
You are so hostile, sarcastic and defiant
Hold onto conclusions that suit your model
Is that my fault?
That you decided against me
When I told you time would run out
Is it really my fault?

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Three Armenian Pigs

Three Armenian Pigs, three Armenian pigs,
See how they run, see how they run,
Their father knew who killed O.J.'s wife,
They enhanced their looks with a surgeon's knife,
Did you ever see such a
glamorous life,
As
three Armenian pigs?

Monday, December 13, 2010

Lest I forget Caroline Cat Girl...

composed August 21, 2010

At last, I found Caroline Cat Girl
As striking as a necklace of fine pearl
I helped her when she lost her wallet
Just being friendly is what I would call it
Did she notice there was something about me?
That I drank coffee but not tea
She is beautifully mysterious these days
In her mysteriously beautiful ways
She comes into town once a while
She has the tell-tale wedge-mouth smile
She attracts so much attention
From the cat boys I will not mention
She pleases us like a flower in full bloom
Your boyfriend is in the same room!
She types feverishly on her laptop
I wonder what she can do with a lollipop
She talks to her family on her cellphone
Verily she will reap what she has sewn
Her wit can cut like a knife
She told him wolf pairs will mate for life
I can see her perky tits and firm butt
Want to eat her glazed doughnut
Caroline, you would break my life into pieces
Is that what you have planned for Jesus?


Well you should see Caroline Cat
She's so good looking when she stares at me like that
Well you should see her in bed
I know that I am not dead
Yes you should see Caroline Cat

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Get a dose of her in sandals and blouse
She knows the lion is nothing like a mouse
She's the kind of a girl
That makes your irises swirl
Yes you could say she was attractively built

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Sunday, December 12, 2010

From my tricorder...

composed on August 7, 2010
Infrared was cool
But Bluetooth has replaced it
Can you see me now?

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Heard This One Before?

from June 18, 2010

Jesus Krishna sat on a wall.
Jesus Krishna had a great fall.
And no one cared.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Deafening Silence

from April 30, 2010

I said I would command God's Finger
And there would not be a sound
And when it came down out of the sky
All I heard was a deafening silence
Just before that
Muhammad arrived
As I said he would
To watch the parade that floated by
A prophesy as bold as any that has been told
And when I bowed toward him
He responded with a deafening silence
Five months later when I put my Dad in his place
As I predicted I would
His irises instantly changed color
Without resorting to a taser
He glared back at me with a deafening silence
When I awoke from the dream
With the dot on my cheek
I remember
My sister in the doorway and her maniacal stare
Her response to my story
Was a deafening silence
Talking about my car at
Coit Tower's lookout
I sensed someone behind me
Rosemary!
The ugly version of Imelda Marcos
A shape-shifter
And a lunatic
Just like my sister
The most disgusting thing on two legs
Was recording me with a Treo phone
Chewing on something with a disdainful glare
When I looked back and mimicked her grimace
She walked off
In a deafening silence
Twice and again in the hallway
The curse showed up
Unannounced
Each time I spoke she was frozen in place
Enveloped in a deafening Silence
You jabbed me in the ribs when I wanted to talk
And looked at me in a deafening silence
Christmas time
A party for the residents
We stared at each other in a deafening silence
“It's nice” you said and
I replied “Good!”
And I awaited your next line
You shook as though your life was about to end
I wondered why in our deafening silence
You found me below the ballerina clown
What could I say?
I had seen you before
I talked about the magnetic attraction of the car
We shook hands
In a deafening silence
I know you tried to cook me alive
When I finally emerged
The cameras caught me accuse with my stare
Your response deafening and silent
I blew you a kiss and you ran past and around
I thought you would say something
Because you are so good with words
But all I heard was a deafening silence
I motioned you over from my balcony
I waited in the coffee shop
So close and yet so far away
Is that all I get?
A Deafening Silence?
God is still talking to us?
Do you know what He said?
Why is it then
When I came to see the solid versions
Of the decade old pictures
You waddled away
Deafening. Silent.
While eating chips and salsa
I thought you looked familiar
You leaned toward me
I think that meant something
But all I could hear
Was a deafening silence
Flash bulbs popping
In the ritzy esplanade
I had to ask someone whom they had seen
You call that an offer?
Was that just a joke?
Without saying a word
I cannot interpret
Your deafening silence
Did you want to say something?
You certainly caught my eye
Anyone can talk to anyone else
In that public place
What your stare meant
I still have no idea
Could someone please translate
The deafening silence?
Call me if you can go
But you made other plans
You had transformed into my wife
Then divorced me the very next day
Of course I got mad
You hardly know me
So I left you there in your deafening silence
Your dog seemed to like me
And you didn't even know about
My history with dogs
You looked so cute
Sitting on the floor
With your unbroken look and deafening silence
More than your brother
More than your buddy
I could tell you get it
As you nodded at me in the deafening silence
It bit me on the thigh
Swelled and deflated
Then ceased to exist
In the Southern twilight
Deafening
Silence
Your words changed by themselves
Words and strokes
Added and removed
But the rest of the world seemed not to notice
They see me
Completely unaware
All their responses are deafening and silent
They took me away without a warning and
Without a greeting
While I slept and was vulnerable
Such cowardice from a superior force
You cannot meet me on an even field?
Why could you not converse with me?
Is that advanced?
You are a deafening silence
You minister to me
Quote what you think I said
To me when, in fact
I came here
To Save
To Minister
To Protect
All of you
Did I prove you right?
Am I proving you wrong?
Heed these words and
Take them to heart
When I read the charges
Present the evidence
Announce the verdict
And prepare to execute your sentence
It would be best
If the only thing that you do
Is to remain
Silent

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Riddle Me

Love?
Hope?
Peace?
Do not make me laugh.
I came here to save you.
And save you I already have.
But you destroyed what I preserved.
And turned what I created into trash.
Just a few simple enemies eliminated
Would have gone a long way
With so many examples to look at
How did you miss what was clear?
Did you think I was joking?
Why did you violate all I said was holy?
Why did you think I would tolerate what had to be removed?
What makes you think you can replace and reinvent me?
You think I'm more powerful than God?
Did you think the prophets were wrong?
Did someone have to introduce you to me?
Let me explain it to all of you dunces
Peter Tosh was able to find me
Columbus Meeker, the real Elijah, found me in someone else's house
And when the first code almost signaled the end
Biggie Smalls had made a pilgrimage
To find me in a nick of time
This really all belongs to me
The world of the destructive and ungrateful
Who did you think you would dupe?
Planet Earth shall become radioactive soup!
And we will see who will remain on my side
One hundred two score and four times a thousand
If so many books are right.
But Jesus Krishna, the Messiah, told you the books would change
And they did!
Did you send my check in the mail?
Did you think I came here to chase tail?
I expected to receive what was promised
Is it possible billions can fail?
Look at the man in the mirror as I do
Can you still love me more than your Father?
Do you love me more than your Mother?
Is it possible to love me more than your child?
Don't say yes when the answer is no
I'm sorry you'll have to go

Riddle Me by Jesus Krishna - What the Matrix is Not


Saturday, November 20, 2010

Tramp and Thief

I see you there
All that hair
Sitting in your very
Inappropriate white dress
When you received your star
Before your first movie comes out

But I know better
You are a tramp and thief
That cross around your neck
Must symbolize something
Besides your well-timed separation and
Running away with my stolen kid

Your publicity machine is in full swing
This movie is a sure fire success
With girls of both genders fawning
Over the mother of the boy-girl
And the idiotic gay midget
Can people even tell the difference?

It does not matter which way I point
At the walk of fame or the wall of shame
Thief, thief, tramp and thief
A real hit
And not so inappropriate 
For a time like this

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Another Revision

For Moschiach Now
Became so disgusted with this world
He decided to let Him finish his job
Hashem Style
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

What I Said When It Really Ended

posted on December 17, 2009, but referenced on June 30, 2006, and originally composed at the end of April 2007

Liberty is sold
Old blue eyes revealed himself
Ted's head in a jar

Monday, November 15, 2010

What Happened to Me?

Sometimes I have to ask
Once, I was a little kid
What ever happened to him?
Occasionally I disappeared
Without any explanation
Even I could not answer that question
What happened to me?
One night that all changed
And it seems I had even more unanswerable questions after that
How was I supposed to accomplish this assignment?
Where would I get instructions and guidance in this choice-less life?
Whom could I trust?
When my friends told me this was all too much
How was I supposed to keep going and believe?
I never envisioned this nightmare would keep going around and around
At a slow yet dizzying pace
When does it end?
Will we ever attain the victory you promised me?
How is it possible someone who should know it all
Still has so much trouble explaining 
A lost decade
Coming up short
Or do I have to finally turn in my work
Incomplete?

...Is Still A King

from December 6, 2009

A king without a throne is still a king.
A king without a crown is still a king.
A king without a queen is still a king.
A king who loses his family is still a king.
A king who has been robbed is still a king.
A king with a wayward kingdom is still a king.
A king with a parasite is still a king.
A king with subjects that do not listen is still a king.
A king forced to starve is still a king.
A king that only God has elected is still a king.
A king whose birthday is celebrated on the wrong day is still a king.
A king who has been abandoned by all his friends is still a king.
A king that has been deceived by countless enemies is still a king.
A king whose tales of woe makes you cry is still a king.
A king no one listens to is still a king.
A king lawyers hate is still a king.
A king judges refuse to listen to is still a king.
A king doctors call crazy is still a king.
A king reduced to being a bum is still a king.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

No More

revealed October 28, 2009

The money people have spoken.
They have wanted me to die.
They preserved the one that was broken.
After I looked him in the eye.

I could not forgive what he did.
He killed my friend and shot me.
My divine true love ran away.
My stalker is so pretty.

So I will not buy apparel from Nike.
I will not purchase any more Crocs.
Nothing more from Under Armor.
Not even a pair of socks.

Pick up your cross and follow me.
But please don't get too close.
I really don't trust any of you.
You stole a seminal dose.

The music can set you free.
If you can only act like a child.
The hungry wolf was playing.
When the balance was getting wild.

I saw the throne on the water.
The greatest vision of all time.
But you were capable of nothing.
Except setting me up for more crime.

The Reaper I became
And Reaper is what I still am.
I now love being the Reaper.
So much more than a good Sam.

The sins you commit are yours.
Don't Panic and Don't Blame Me.
I figured this out a long time ago.
The afterlife is where I long to be.

There I will receive what deserve.
Ice Cream in which I will swim.
Ladies who know how to love.
As I fill above the rim.

Does anyone question the outcome.
Of what happens when you fail to plan?
God laughs when you plan anyway.
His adversary takes ahold of what she can.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

California Girls

placed in blogosphere on August 6, 2009

California Girls

Oh, how I hate thee
You think you are so terrific
With your revolutionary weight loss schemes
And your movies loosely-based on my life
With albums not-so-loosely based
Your five pounds of make-up
Fake tits
Talking about how spiritual you are
In front of cameras
So you can be more popular

You shake your ass at me
Show me your cleavage
But cannot spare a sandwich
Or you tell me you cannot talk
At any time for over eleven years
Because your boyfriend
Will get jealous
You don't even miss
What you could have had
You want me to go to your party
But you have no time for mine
Convince yourself I was the one with the bad attitude
You can panic now

Maybe if I shoot you
Just to see if God will protect you
The same way He protected me
We will really see
Who is right
And who is wrong
Once and for all

A Dirge for Druanna the Realist

placed online on July 27, 2009

Druanna!

Is it just your head that is in the clouds?
Or are you a complete airhead?
I remember speaking with you last Winter
I recall you saying "I get it"
A hundred times
It was a terrific phone call
And I remember you telling me
"You Rock!"

I also remember how you told me
How much you wanted your son
From your first marriage back in your life.
I told you it would happen
And I told you how to do it.

About five months later
It happened, and even I got a little choked up
And I did my best to congratulate you
And let you know there were some things to still keep in mind
And then you forgot about me
I was sure you would be sensitive enough
And grateful enough to make some time for me
Especially while I was recovering from the Staph
For over two months.

I could not have made it more obvious
What I wanted from you
But in sixty days, you could not make one for me
Unless you consider your reference
To the One in your Tarot deck
An adequate reward
For helping to restore your family

You are extreme density
So perceptive about the worlds all around us
But unable to understand your own physical body
That manifested some serious symptoms
Because you got a lot fatter
Since you put your husband's ring on

After you die
You will spend time in a pain amplifier
That will recreate my pain exponentially
To make it clear to you what it means to be me
And the penalty for being a user
A taker
A new age web mistress
And a phony

ISIS: A poem I wrote for another poet

in forty-five years and half
no one has done what you have
you showed me someone can reciprocate
based on trust earned in one night
everyone else has told me they wanted more
all others wanted to know why
I was not more successful
they never told me they believed in me
that they trusted me
the way you did
is it just because you needed me?
was it just because you were tired?
do you perceive me as the lesser of evils?
did you begin to resent me because
I wanted you to get better?
when everyone else takes more from me than they give
is it any wonder I am stuck in my car?
it is difficult to put into words
the gratitude I feel towards you
whether I see you again on this side
or the other
God knows what you mean to me
all my other friends seem like
a wheel barrow of talk now

Get To Know Me - Version 2.0

Same name, different poem for July 24, 2009

I am Jewish
Which makes me negative
I am Jesus
Which makes me positively your King twice over
I am Islamic
Which makes me neutral
Because I know that even I am nothing without God
I am not a robber
I have been robbed
I am not a killer
The Reaper is far beyond that
I understand Death
Without having died
I see myself screaming from every rooftop
My face looks back at me
Every way I turn
My fans are in Heaven
And floating along the curb
You all want a piece of me
And I want peace from you
I inspire those in the halls of power
The ivory tower
And even the bedroom
I am the Lion King
And brother cigarette dispenser
The look of paralyzing venom
The taste of lemonade
The voice of pain
The sound of the concrete jungle
The touch of the divine
The broken heart
I know you
I understand you
But I do not understand your hesitance
To find me
Right next to you
For so many years

Ramsau 3058

written a few years before the posting on July 21, 2009

Commander Radick rose from his endo-chair
He spoke transfixed in a thousand meter stare
"Volunteer for today's action, if you dare
Today we engage the enemy: Ghost Bear
This bloody war has lost the meaning of fair
I seek to surprise them, catch them unaware
Siege the command post and extinguish them there
Kerensky's promise fulfilled this day, I swear
Summon technicians and tell them prepare
Heavy 'mech binaries with laser hardware
If you embody honor in this affair
The the fruits of victory we all will share
Now fight to the finish and never despair
Ramsau will be ours when we all take the square
Destroy everything in sight. Strip this rock bare
Leave nothing for salvage and none to repair
We pilot expertly.  Our aim does not err
Our warriors are best; no one can compare
Soon the Wolf Clan's might and skill all will beware
When word of our conquest fills the morning air."

I Have No Friends

written and posted July 17, 2009.  Dedicated to Victoria

I HATE YOU ALL
NOW GO TO HELL
YOU RESPECT ONLY MONEY
I HAVE NOTHING TO SELL
YOUR PRAYERS ARE MEANINGLESS
TO THE BOTTOMLESS PIT
SO MANY CHANCES
I MIGHT AS WELL QUIT
A HEAP OF ADVICE
IS MEANINGLESS TO ME
NOT A SINGLE ONE OF YOU
UNDERSTOOD THE TREE
ARE YOU ALL THE WHORE
ON THE DOWNWARD SLANT?
WHO WHEN TOLD WHAT WAS REAL
REPLIED I WANNA HELP
BUT I CAN'T
HELP ME MOVE WOULD HAVE MADE SENSE
BUT YOU SIT IN MY CHAIR
OR SIT ON A FENCE
THE LONGER YOU TOOK
THE WORSE IT GOT
POINT THE FINGER IN THE MIRROR
AND FIND THE SPOT
WHERE YOU ARE EMPTY
AND SO AM I
I REFUSE TO SUBMIT
TO ANYONE WHO FAILED ME
WE'RE ONLY HUMAN
BUT WHAT ABOUT ME?

Sunday, October 31, 2010

What God and I both see

You are all about to have your Judgment Day because these are the days like Noah.

You are all an enormous mass of
Idolatrous
Murderous
Adulterous
Treacherous
Covetous
Larcenous
Lecherous
Magic-Casting
Moschiach Denying
Tuchus Schtuppers
Who don't know what day Shabbos is!

Friday, October 29, 2010

Overall

composed to be shared with everyone on April 30, 2009

Overall, girls have been worthless to me.
Overall, the planet deserves to be destroyed for its sheer ignorance and greed.
Overall, the highest concentration of hypocrites are in show business.
Overall, my worst enemies have been Jews.
Overall, the most ridiculous have been Catholics.
Overall, the most uninformed have been Muslims.
Overall, the most dangerous have been atheists.
Overall, the least caring have been Communists.
Overall, the most disgusting have been men.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Read This When I Die...

.... And you expected me to save you

you filled this world with nuclear weapons
you showed me my visions ahead of time
you let Hitler escape and gave him safe harbor
you were invaded and infested from beyond more than once
you flirt with me instead of love me
you tried to kill me so many times
you collectively destroy the planet
you don't recognize me in person
you offend me and tell me I have a problem
you let Khomeini escape and unleashed a cancer
you repeatedly stole from me
you did not follow my instructions
you evicted me in so many ways
you turned your back on me
you disobey God's Commandments in so many ways
you refused me and broke my heart so many times
you did nothing for me while Scriptures changed
you aborted an immaculate conception
you raised my children without me
you came back to life and defied me
you deceived me and played games
you stalked me
you spied on me
you have been inhabited by divine beings
you harassed me
you turned me into a quadriplegic temporarily
you keep retelling my jokes
you pretend I do not exist and cover me up
you gave me no way out when you witnessed signs all over and still took too long
you saw miracles I predicted come to pass then ran away
you thought you could find a woman to help me when I couldn't because they were the primary culprits in ruining God's plan
you built a church of over a billion people that were mostly ignorant of the warnings in the Holy Books they all possessed
you photographed me from near and far without my permission
you became rich and famous in MY WORLD but could not share with me

You now mistake me for someone who cares


posted in March of 2009 seven times, for a good reason

O' Jenny

O' Jenny can you tell me
How big are your implants today?
They are the most important thing
For little girls of both genders
To talk about over their teacups
A successful career in La La Land
Involves landing a wallet that's big
And eating as much as you can
From the sunny California selection
Of warm tacos and gourmet hot dogs
Imported from around the world
When you sleep at night in your home
In the land known as Beach Beverly Hills
Do you think you are better than me
Because I wound up with nothing
For accomplishing the impossible
So many times, in so little time?
Can you tell me why should anyone care
What a milfy bisexual thinks
About any issue at all?
When she knows the Messiah uniquely but
Cohabits with the industry's biggest fool
Which necessarily begs the question
Which one of you is dimmer?
If you knew were I was in Mesa
I would have talked had you bothered to show up
Did you hear what I said in Diego and notice
How your son got well soon thereafter?
Do you still blame the inoculation
For a problem that is much more complex
Does God need to come down from Heaven
And slap you around your slippery head
To get you to tell the truth
Or will you keep on deceiving the world
About the real source of knowledge
That has put the bread on your table
And why it ran dry so long ago
Waiting for people just like you
To get real with the real fountainhead
When we all appear before the Father
And people will all know the Truth
There will be a multitude of the dead
Pointing a finger at you and will say
"O' Jenny, she could have done something
To make our hero's life much easier
Instead she chose herself
Just like everyone else in the county
Which made all the other girls look bad
Especially the elderly and crazy
Which yelled at him in their ignorance
The best she could do is make dirty pictures
It is what she always did best
She knew Jesus uniquely
But thought he was someone else's problem
And now the rest of humanity suffers
Because of Jenny's bad examples
People think of her as an object
And play with themselves day and night
And her selfishness helped push the world
From its blue balance into the red
Is it really the Strip that threatens us all
The one that Jesus earned long ago?
Or is it really the City of Angels
A misnomer of biblical proportions
That caused all of us to go under
Because they raped and beat up Lady Justice?
If they were to remake a large statue
To resemble what she once looked like
It would probably resemble our Jenny
So the Universe could get a big laugh."


posted originally on May 19, 2009

Monday, October 25, 2010

Disposable Jesus and the disposable planet

posted on February 15, 2009

You needed me more than you know
But you wanted to get rid of me
You gave birth to my children
But did not let me be a part of their lives
All of the people, places, and things you take for granted would not exist if not for me
But you all think you are me
And you are more interested in my junk
Than you are in me
Last time you did not esteem me
This time you have forgotten to love me
You abuse me as if I was a masochist
But I have never been that
And I live in a world of "how much money you got?"
What makes you think I won't trade it all in
For the Kingdom in Heaven?
His will has been done on Earth
This is not the only inhabited planet in the Universe
What makes you think it is God's favorite?
He has been SCREAMING at you with signs, miracles, and intervention
And you ignore all this, and me?
Why are you looking for aliens to help you?
Divine beings have been actively speaking to you for over a decade.
They helped us defeat the aliens.
And God made it all possible.
How do you think He feels, now?

Monday, October 11, 2010

Bienvenidos al mundo de Jesus muy triste

from August 24, 2008


Bienvenudos al mundo de Jesus muy triste.

Yo tengo el corazon negro y frio.

Tengo hambre como muchas personas en este mundo realmente.

Tengo una mascara felicidad.

Pero my cara es melancolia.

Muchas personas en los Estados Unidos preguntarme.

"Donde esta su dinero?  Queremos su dinero.  Nosotros gustamos su automovil."

No lo tengo dinero.

No me gusta los Nephilim como mi padre.

La Besa de Muerta, Nicole Scherzinger, tiene dinero.

Nicole, la Riena de amor de boca y Hummer Estrechas,

Y todos que practica brujeria en casas de misticismo son malos.

Ella puede robar dinero de esposos de otros damas.

Todos los amigos de Nicole no puedes decirme claro.

Todos quieren vivir en mi cabeza.

Todos entienden que este vida es como una pelicula.

No!  Este es el mundo realmente.

Amigos de Nicole Scherzinger pueden decirme como Cyclone Nargis en Juno de 2006.

Ahora el Papi de Dinero es muerto.

Que lastima.

Como esta Christina Applegate, Pussycat Doll numero uno?

Buena Suerte, amiga.

Quiero vivir en mi pais, El Salvador.

Digame!

Mi jente de El Salvador.

Estan listos para mi?

La chupacabra en Texas buscarme.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

From June 9, 2008

Dear Gloria,

I remember when I first had a vision of you.

A wide-eyed boy looking at the sun

While I was riding in the family car through the desert.

I saw you as an adult and was told we would have

An Immaculate Conception.

I kept that a secret as long as I could

Because I knew no one would believe me.

When I first saw you in my Dad's art store,

That had the same name as your Dad and your brother,

I remember your dress with bright pink flowers and the big straw hat.

I recognized you instantly as you ran in giggling and got lost.

Who could forget the afternoons in the dog park?

Answering question after question

And solving as many problems as I could

By opening myself up to God for the right responses.

I do not believe I could have done much of it without you there

Despite the fact you interrupted and contradicted me as often as you did.

It seems so strange now.

I was boy when I first saw you

And when we finally had some time to spend together

Twenty five years later

You always seemed like a silly little girl to me.

You and I knew it was over before we even got started

As we played hide-and-seek

In the world only we understood.

I remember going to Koo Koo Roo with our dogs

While being monitored.

I remember sharing coated ice cream at Acapulco.

What happened to you?

Is that why my Dad's store burned down?

Was that a crime or a punishment?

I remember the last vision I had of you during Holy Days.

People have told me they have seen you in their dreams since then.

I would destroy everything I can see right now to be with you again.

But that is not in the cards right now.

No one will ever take your place.

How is it people can believe I am the touch of death

And benefactor of everlasting life?

Only God could make the enigma

That I am.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Discord in China

Be realistic!
Know Buddha and Confucius
Are not far apart.

Dear Leora

March 15, 2008

What are you going to miss when you die?

I can assure you our ancestors are going to rip the shit out of you when you die.

Are you going to miss sucking the life out of people when you die, you parasite?

I know it has been very difficult for you without my Mother for you to suck the life out of.

I am sure you are going to miss telling all your lies and being the first at everything.

I am sure you are going to miss cruising the gutter for scumbag boyfriends to mold into someone who would kill me.

I am sure you are going to miss "shoulding" on people.

I am sure you are going to miss "going to war" and losing every battle.

I am sure you are going to miss wasting a ton of money doing everything wrong.

I am sure you are going to miss stretching. And body work. And predicting doom and gloom.

I am sure you are going to miss telling everyone they are wrong, proclaiming yourself an astrology expert but denying the conclusion is you are Satan-Bitch-Khomeini.

I am sure that being the Malebolgia on Earth was a lot of fun and that driving me insane was your crowning achievement.  But you had help there.

Your death will be my greatest victory.

The geneticists have already revealed Dad for what he is, even though his dentists could have done that a LONG time ago.  But they think there are some good things to gain from him.

Isn’t ironic that my eyes went from Brown to Hazel but the DMV did not let me make that change on my Driver’s License?  And yet Dad’s eyes change color all the time.  Do people like him need "mood" Driver’s Licenses to match their eye color by the hour?

These are not the type of discoveries we need.

Creating people that deny the existence of God is awful.  People that only want to stuff their faces are disgusting.  People with selective memory are abhorrent.  People who never take responsibility for what they do are abominable.  People who chose the wrong side every time are useless.  And people who want to cover me up, make me go away, take your side over mine, and deny my existence should die.

And people that care so much more about themselves than they do about me that they would make me suffer are about to get their just due all over the world.

In a movie version of this life I would be justified in killing both of you.

Why hasn’t anyone done that for me yet?

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Men In Black

Men in black around
I know they watch my motions
When will this all end?

In big cars they drive
Members of a special club
Where are they going?

He is our hero
We all know "he is coming."
Soon, you all will see

I say "I am he."
I cannot say, "I am not."
But I say "going."

 

composed in 1999

deafening silence

I said I would command God's Finger
And there would not be a sound
And when it came down out of the sky
All I heard was a deafening silence
Just before that
Muhammad arrived
As I said he would
To watch the parade that floated by
A prophesy as bold as any that has been told
And when I bowed toward him
He responded with a deafening silence
Five months later when I put my Dad in his place
As I predicted I would
His irises instantly changed color
Without resorting to a taser
He glared back at me with a deafening silence
When I awoke from the dream
With the dot on my cheek
I remember
My sister in the doorway and her maniacal stare
Her response to my story
Was a deafening silence
Talking about my car at
Coit Tower's lookout
I sensed someone behind me
Rosemary!
The ugly version of Imelda Marcos
A shape-shifter
And a lunatic
Just like my sister
The most disgusting thing on two legs
Was recording me with a Treo phone
Chewing on something with a disdainful glare
When I looked back and mimicked her grimace
She walked off
In a deafening silence
Twice and again in the hallway
The curse showed up
Unannounced
Each time I spoke she was frozen in place
Enveloped in a deafening Silence
You jabbed me in the ribs when I wanted to talk
And looked at me in a deafening silence
Christmas time
A party for the residents
We stared at each other in a deafening silence
“It's nice” you said and
I replied “Good!”
And I awaited your next line
You shook as though your life was about to end
I wondered why in our deafening silence
You found me below the ballerina clown
What could I say?
I had seen you before
I talked about the magnetic attraction of the car
We shook hands
In a deafening silence
I know you tried to cook me alive
When I finally emerged
The cameras caught me accuse with my stare
Your response deafening and silent
I blew you a kiss and you ran past and around
I thought you would say something
Because you are so good with words
But all I heard was a deafening silence
I motioned you over from my balcony
I waited in the coffee shop
So close and yet so far away
Is that all I get?
A Deafening Silence?
God is still talking to us?
Do you know what He said?
Why is it then
When I came to see the solid versions
Of the decade old pictures
You waddled away
Deafening. Silent.
While eating chips and salsa
I thought you looked familiar
You leaned toward me
I think that meant something
But all I could hear
Was a deafening silence
Flash bulbs popping
In the ritzy esplanade
I had to ask someone whom they had seen
You call that an offer?
Was that just a joke?
Without saying a word
I cannot interpret
Your deafening silence
Did you want to say something?
You certainly caught my eye
Anyone can talk to anyone else
In that public place
What your stare meant
I still have no idea
Could someone please translate
The deafening silence?
Call me if you can go
But you made other plans
You had transformed into my wife
Then divorced me the very next day
Of course I got mad
You hardly know me
So I left you there in your deafening silence
Your dog seemed to like me
And you didn't even know about
My history with dogs
You looked so cute
Sitting on the floor
With your unbroken look and deafening silence
More than your brother
More than your buddy
I could tell you get it
As you nodded at me in the deafening silence
It bit me on the thigh
Swelled and deflated
Then ceased to exist
In the Southern twilight
Deafening
Silence
Your words changed by themselves
Words and strokes
Added and removed
But the rest of the world seemed not to notice
They see me
Completely unaware
All their responses are deafening and silent
They took me away without a warning and
Without a greeting
While I slept and was vulnerable
Such cowardice from a superior force
You cannot meet me on an even field?
Why could you not converse with me?
Is that advanced?
You are a deafening silence
You minister to me
Quote what you think I said
To me when, in fact
I came here
To Save
To Minister
To Protect
All of you
Did I prove you right?
Am I proving you wrong?
Heed these words and
Take them to heart
When I read the charges
Present the evidence
Announce the verdict
And prepare to execute your sentence
It would be best
If the only thing that you do
Is to remain
Silent