Dear Leora

March 15, 2008

What are you going to miss when you die?

I can assure you our ancestors are going to rip the shit out of you when you die.

Are you going to miss sucking the life out of people when you die, you parasite?

I know it has been very difficult for you without my Mother for you to suck the life out of.

I am sure you are going to miss telling all your lies and being the first at everything.

I am sure you are going to miss cruising the gutter for scumbag boyfriends to mold into someone who would kill me.

I am sure you are going to miss "shoulding" on people.

I am sure you are going to miss "going to war" and losing every battle.

I am sure you are going to miss wasting a ton of money doing everything wrong.

I am sure you are going to miss stretching. And body work. And predicting doom and gloom.

I am sure you are going to miss telling everyone they are wrong, proclaiming yourself an astrology expert but denying the conclusion is you are Satan-Bitch-Khomeini.

I am sure that being the Malebolgia on Earth was a lot of fun and that driving me insane was your crowning achievement.  But you had help there.

Your death will be my greatest victory.

The geneticists have already revealed Dad for what he is, even though his dentists could have done that a LONG time ago.  But they think there are some good things to gain from him.

Isn’t ironic that my eyes went from Brown to Hazel but the DMV did not let me make that change on my Driver’s License?  And yet Dad’s eyes change color all the time.  Do people like him need "mood" Driver’s Licenses to match their eye color by the hour?

These are not the type of discoveries we need.

Creating people that deny the existence of God is awful.  People that only want to stuff their faces are disgusting.  People with selective memory are abhorrent.  People who never take responsibility for what they do are abominable.  People who chose the wrong side every time are useless.  And people who want to cover me up, make me go away, take your side over mine, and deny my existence should die.

And people that care so much more about themselves than they do about me that they would make me suffer are about to get their just due all over the world.

In a movie version of this life I would be justified in killing both of you.

Why hasn’t anyone done that for me yet?